2023-05-16 Ruminations on self
Tue 16 May 2023 08:57:57 AM CDT
It's really hard being perpetually watched by someone that'll guilt you when they think you're fucking up with respect to their interests in your doing things for them.
Oh, the madness of performing for self-interested audience!
It pushes one into a meta behavioral zone where one can't "just be". One must constantly be pre-calculating how words/behaviors might lead to persecution back to the middle (of their wishes).
And of course they'll never realize they do such, because then they'd not be able to live with themselves.
Not that anyone *can* lived with a "self"...
because...
said "self" is precisely the aforementioned maniac *and* its slave.